The Healing Hope

The Healing Hope Newsletter - September 2011

Tue, 20 Sep 2011 19:05:00 GMT

The Healing Hope Newsletter - September 2011 Dear Friends, When Katies husband adopted radical religious views, he hammered her with his belief that the Creators name was not God and the Messiahs name was not Jesus. Since Id been praying in those names, Norm insisted that He had never heard me. Devastated, Katie worried that He been deaf to her prayers all those years. Perhaps she had never known God at all even though she accepted Jesus as Savior when she was eight years-old! I was in a black hole of despair. Throughout her painful marriage, shed prayed to be a better person and waited for deliverance or a miraculous recovery of their marriage. One day when Norm told me I was stupid for the hundredth time, he said: I want you to leave and I want a divorce. His exact words. That very moment, Katie heard God very clearly. Its time. Youre through. So very calmly, I said Okay. He stormed out. For eighteen years, Id felt obligated to keep my marriage vows. Now I knew it was over. I found strength in a home church where they accepted me. It was through them that God first showed his loving-kindness. Then a troubled friend confided that she had been repeating the destructive mantra of, stupid, ugly, worthless, to herself for years. To her horror, Katie realized that shed been doing the same thing. After that, she began to replace those words with Smart, passable and worthwhile. About a year ago, Katie told her story in church and thanked them for their love and patience. A few days later, she received an e-mail from friends in another state saying theyd been aware of her marital struggle and had been praying for her. You were always a bright spot in our world, like a porch light on a dark prairie. You can see it for milesThanks for sharing your light with us. Katie was surprised and puzzled. How could anyone think so highly of me? When I prayed that God would enlighten me, He gave me a three-part answer. First, in the Pastors sermon the following Sunday, he emphasized the fact that we should forgive ourselves. To Katie, that meant that she should forgive herself for failing at marriage. The next day she heard a preacher on the radio urge Christians to stop cursing themselves. That can cause fear, shame and even illness. I knew that was true because the stress of not measuring up had made me sick. The third day she reread about the virtuous woman in Proverbs 31. She perceives that her merchandise is good. Although Id achieved major accomplishments in my work, it hit me that I still doubted my abilities. That was a revelation to me. When she accepted her worth, she instantly sensed the peace of being loved by God, her Father, by Jesus, her brother, and by the Holy Spirit, her best friend. Katie knows now that she is not to agree with the enemy who comes to steal, kill and destroy. A few days later, she almost skipped to her car after having lunch with church friends. It was such a joy to be with them, knowing they liked me. Sarcastically, she murmured to herself. You think youre something special, dont you? I grinned in answer. Yes, I am! My Father thinks Im special, so I must be. Blessings, Marion Duckworth *Katie and Norm are pseudonyms Visit my websites at: <a href="http://www.marionduckworthministries.com">http://www.marionduckworthministries.com</a> <a href="http://www.healinghopeonline.com">http://www.healinghopeonline.com</a>

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The Healing Hope Newsletter - July 2011

Tue, 12 Jul 2011 03:09:00 GMT

Healing Hope Newsletter July, 2011 Dear Friends, Stacy* had been convinced by the cult to which she belonged that people with limitations are weak and weak people are unacceptable. After she left the group, she began to realize that without Christ, everyone is weak in some way. So I couldnt rely on my own strength. I needed Gods help each day. She was stunned when Alicia, the child to which shed given birth and put up for adoption tracked her down. For three months, we had a wonderful reunion. Eventually, however, Stacy sensed that something was wrong. My daughter wanted me to see her as a perfect young woman to get my approval. What she didnt understand was that she had my approval already. During their tumultuous relationship, Alicia would reach out, then pull back. At one point, I didnt see her for a year. Then she received the worst phone call of her life. It was Alicias adoptive mother telling me that our daughter had committed suicide. She was forty years old. Devastated, Stacy finally faced the fact that Alicia suffered from bipolar and borderline personality disorders. When she found me, I wasnt enough to save her. Neither was her adoptive mom, who is a strong woman with a professional career. Alicia was so broken that she didnt feel as though she could have a connection with God. As often is the case, her daughter was prescribed medication for her mental illness but wouldnt keep taking it. Stacy points out that we humans resist admitting that were broken and shy away from anything that underscores the fact. Then, about ten years ago, Stacys mother began slipping into a form of dementia. When I was finally healed enough to forgive the past and have a relationship with her, mom seemed to have abandoned me one more time. I dont understand why my daughter had to suffer so much and I am healthy and have a good life. The fact makes me feel that I need to work to justify my existence somehow. Another question with which Stacy has struggled is why God allows people to suffer from mental illness. Why doesnt he just fix it? I remember when I realized that some of this stuff isnt going to get fixed. She comforts herself with the fact that God doesnt expect more of an individual than theyre capable of producing. After years of struggle, Stacy says she is finally able to accept the world the way it is and herself the way she is and trust Gods grace to conform her to the image of Jesus. I spent ten years in the cult giving up as much of myself as I possibly could in the hopes that what was left would be acceptable to God. Even after my husband and I had a home in the country and all the accoutrements of a successful American family, I felt empty. Thats when I began to realize that I had to accept myself first. It all started from the inside. Most important, God accepted all of meeven the mess I kept hidden. It took more than fifty years for Stacy to come home. Blessings, Marion Duckworth *Stacy is a pseudonym Visit my websites at: <a href="http://www.marionduckworthministries.com">http://www.marionduckworthministries.com</a> <a href="http://www.healinghopeonline.com">http://www.healinghopeonline.com</a>

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The Healing Hope Newsletter - May 2011

Mon, 09 May 2011 17:51:00 GMT

The Healing Hope Newsletter May 2011 Dear Friends, Although she was repeatedly sexually abused growing up, Jinny was able to forgive the perpetrators. Years later, God used her ministry as a clown to set her free from feelings of degradation. When the opportunity came to perform overseas, Jinny was both stunned and thrilled. Ive performed as Promise the clown in Argentina, the Philippines and Uganda. The fact that she didnt know the languages didnt matter because clowning has a language all its own. Clowning proved so popular in Uganda that she was able to perform there seven times. Busia is a village close to the border of Kenya in north Africa. On one of the occasions, she arrived the last two days of the crusade. People had come from miles around to worship the Lord together, so there were thousands present. We were ushered to a makeshift platform in the middle of a huge field and joined in the praise and worship music that was already in progress. When the Ugandan Christians danced, the entire platform bounced and Jinny was afraid she might fall off. But a man leaped up from the ground and caught her just in time. God sent him right when I needed him. We were the first clowns ever in Uganda, so people didnt even know what a clown was. When it was their turn to minister, Jinny and the troupe performed a skit on forgiveness and also one on salvation. Hundreds came forward at the invitation! Many times, Jinny and the others would teach two or three Christians how to clown and then hold a crusade including them. They left the clothing and makeup behind so the Ugandans could perform after the Americans left. The clown ministry is still active there; we still receive reports of their success. The ministry is changing that country. No matter where she performs, audiences understand her illustration of a broken heart. I form a heart out of play dough and, as I describe the ways we can be wounded by words and actions, I add a seed to that heart. By the time Im through, the heart is so full of seeds that it breaks apart. The audience can see that its beyond repair. Then Jinny brings out a beautiful bag. This stands for the hand of God, she tells the audience. If we choose to put our poor, ruined heart in his hand, He will give us a new, healed heart. Its up to us to make that choice. Then, Jinny puts the ruined heart in the beautiful bag, reaches deep inside and takes out a beautiful, unblemished, whole heart. Prayerfully, she asks the listeners if they will give God that chance. To close, she asks if they have any wounds in their heartsperhaps the pain of abuse and molestation. Men and women rush to the altar to be set freeeven the abusers themselves. Everything Ive been through in my life has been worth it if God can use my experiences to help others become free the way He has done for me. Blessings, Marion Duckworth Visit my websites: <a href="http://www.marionduckworthministries.com">http://www.marionduckworthministries.com</a> <a href="http://www.healinghopeonline.com">http://www.healinghopeonline.com</a>

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